Hello, my name is Archi Ssan and I knew Felicia for roughly her last eight months, we worked strongly together from the start.
In her last five months after the scale of St Paul's Cathedral with me, my son Rhal and Steven, she worked even more closely with me in the desk top and administrative side of activism dealing with our legal defence. In those days on a very broad average say of 3 days a week, it was extremely intense, work wise and aspirationally too and we had much to talk about it seems and we weren't shy about what we had to say about our world and ourselves to each other.
I've been wondering about Felicia most of the day quite a lot now and it's a little over a year since she did that scale which changed, not simply her view about everything, but I think she realised what it really feels like when you take the apparently exciting and virtuous theory, into practice. Then I think she found it too deep and dark to believe she could even survive here anymore.
For any who are confused about her, she really did know what she wanted when she could have had almost anything most women would want. In her mid thirties and very visually attractive although never wearing makeup, brought up in great schools, heavily qualified and with parents who live on the shores of lake Genève. She got to the top of both her previous PR and academic careers, yet I know she could have bagged any multi-millionaire trophy husband and lived a life of opulence as her family may have hoped for.
It might appear confusing, but she really did know what she wanted, and sought it all the time so purley, not like others, she actually really did look for only what she believed in with out compramise. It's not not all gloom and certainly there is sparkle of course, and lots of it too. Perhaps, I like to wander that some of her best moments were on a 3 foot ledge, unfurling that 60 foot banner by the dome of St Paul's Cathedral, about 230 feet up in the sky over London. I know Felicia most certainly sparkled doing what she believed in then, but perhaps none of the four scalers there including Felicia, realised it at the time.
As I reflect, I have realised over the months, how Felicia really began to see the world she thought she wanted to live in. Well she did, and it was much worse than she first thought it would feel, and yes, it doesn't seem to matter how smart your are when you go through such a journey.
So many were hurt by our loss I know, but if it matters, it now looks to me like she died doing what she so very sincerely believed in and mostly enriched her until near the end. She was never prepared to be false about what she believed in, and if so perhaps the cost was fatal.
She hated the word suicide and really couldn't identify with it, what she did was her ultimate act of relinquishment and love for a world she could no longer accept. An act of freedom not a crime, that's what attracted her to Humanworth and I know how Felicia always embraced the beauty of freedom so vigorously.
In a life where I seem to find peculiar people often, I know I could never have imagined such a person as Felicia before, and I am so blessed and enchanted for knowing her; an exceptionally beautiful woman of this world.
(Suffer No More)
Sent by Archi on 18/10/2017
Felicia was like a shooting star - she came unexpectedly on to my horizon, lit up my sky and dazzled me, then drifted away to the other side of the moon. I feel so blessed that she should have crossed my path and I shall plant a tree in Kenya in her memory. Sleep in peace dear Fliss, or have fun with our beloved Juanita !
Sent by Pénélope on 01/05/2017